ESDM Online

Autism is complex and deserves our utmost understanding, care, and focus. My mission is to help families help their children become the people they envision to be. Doing so requires easy to use tools, flexible strategies, and creative solutions.
   

Welcome to ESDM Online, a resource for parents and providers eager to discover ways to help children connect, communicate, and learn. Here, you will find examples, tips, activities, the latest research findings, videos, and much more to support your goals as a parent or provider. Join the community and become part of this mission to create positive learning experiences for children.
  1. Giving children opportunities to practice their skills through play and everyday activities.
  2. Creating a welcoming, accessible and nonjudgemental space to hear about and share ideas.
  3. Helping children feel calm, safe and supported.
Together, let's nurture meaningful growth and positive experiences for every child.
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Click the video for a brief welcome message!
Active Ingredients for Change
 
Young children learn best when having fun. Whether it is play, bath, meal time, or another routine, each moment can involve the ESDM to help children connect, communicate, and learn. See how you can get started with the ESDM with your child or the families whom you support in an early childhood learning environment.
Quick Tip

Find out how to use tips from the ESDM for early social-communication skills important to life-long learning, behavior, and health with your child or with families whom you support in an early childhood learning environment.

Learn what hyper‑sensitivity means, why it happens in autism, and how simple naturalistic strategies can support young children’s regulation during everyday moments, with tips you can use immediately in this month’s video.

👉Watch the Quick Tip video

Latest News

Read monthly research about intervention outcomes for children with or at risk of autism; coaching supports for their families; and/or family-centered, culturally inclusive coaching tools to help early childhood professionals support families. Each monthly article is publicly available for free access.


Empathy and prosocial behavior (helping, sharing, comforting) are often talked about as if they are single traits. But in real life empathy is shaped by many interacting factors, including social experiences, emotional regulation, and early mental health symptoms. This month's Latest News explores how these pieces fit together for young autistic and neurotypical children to shape prosocial behavior. The researchers wanted to understand:

How does empathy relate to prosocial behavior in early childhood?


Do social interactions help explain (mediate) this relationship?

How do early emotional or behavioral symptoms influence this pathway?

Are these patterns similar or different for autistic and neurotypical children?
What They Found
  • Empathy supports prosocial behavior — but not directly.  
    For both autistic and neurotypical children, empathy predicted prosocial behavior through social interactions. In other words, children who showed more empathy tended to engage more socially, and those social interactions created opportunities for prosocial behavior to develop.
  • Early emotional and behavioral symptoms changed the pathway.  
    Certain early symptoms influenced how strongly empathy translated into prosocial behavior. These symptoms didn’t erase empathy — they shaped how easily children could act on it. Internalizing symptoms (worry, sadness, withdrawal) weakened the link between empathy and social engagement. Externalizing symptoms (impulsivity, acting out) made it harder for children to use empathy in social situations.

  • Autistic and neurotypical children showed similar overall patterns, with some differences in strength.  
    The pathways existed in both groups, but autistic children showed a stronger influence of social interaction quality on prosocial behavior; and a greater impact of early emotional symptoms on whether empathy translated into action. This suggests autistic children may have empathy capacities that are intact but expressed differently depending on social context and regulation demands.

  • Social interactions were the key mediator.  
    Across groups, social engagement acted as the “bridge” between empathy and prosocial behavior. When children had more positive or frequent social interactions, empathy was more likely to show up as helping, sharing, or comforting.
What This Means in Practice

These findings reinforce a neuroaffirming, developmental perspective: autistic children often have empathy — the question is whether the environment supports them in expressing it.

1. Empathy expression depends on social opportunities, not just internal capacity.

Supporting prosocial behavior means supporting the context, not “fixing” the child. Children may feel concern or notice others’ emotions but struggle to act on it when:

  • the social situation is fast‑moving

  • they are unsure what to do

  • they are overwhelmed or dysregulated

  • they are navigating unfamiliar peers


2. Emotional and behavioral symptoms can mask empathy, not replace it.

Internalizing symptoms may look like, hesitation, withdrawal, or uncertainty about how to join in. Externalizing symptoms may look like impulsive responding or difficulty pausing to notice others’ cues. In both cases, the child may still care deeply — they just need support to translate empathy into action.

What helps:

  • co‑regulation (an adult helping a child return to calm by offering steady, supportive presence — like modeling slow breathing, using a soothing voice, or sharing a calming activity together)

  • modeling simple prosocial actions

  • slowing down interactions

  • visual supports for “what to do when someone is upset”
  • predictable routines for peer engagement

 


3. Social interaction quality matters more than quantity.

For autistic children especially, prosocial behavior grows when:

  • interactions are structured, predictable, and supportive

  • adults scaffold turn‑taking and shared attention

  • peers are coached to be patient and responsive

  • the child feels emotionally safe


4. Prosocial behavior is a developmental skill, not a moral trait.

The study reframes prosociality as something that emerges from empathy, social learning, regulation, and emotional wellbeing. This helps shift conversations with families away from “they don’t care” toward “they care, and here’s how we can help them show it.”


Why It Matters

This research supports a neuroaffirming understanding of autistic children’s social and emotional development by showing that empathy is present, but its expression depends on regulation, context, and support. Early emotional symptoms can interfere with social engagement — not empathy itself — and prosocial behavior grows through safe, supported interactions rather than pressure or correction. For early intervention teams, this means prioritizing co‑regulation, emotional safety, predictable social routines, child‑led engagement, and scaffolding social opportunities instead of expecting spontaneous prosociality. This perspective helps families see their child’s strengths and understand the “why” behind social behaviors, reducing stigma and increasing compassion.


Click the article (above) for a deeper look at how empathy, social interactions, and early symptoms work together — and how this framework can guide more responsive, developmentally aligned support for autistic and neurotypical children.

Play of the Month
 
Play not only brings smiles to children's faces but also helps them learn, feel good about themselves, and enjoy the interaction that comes from doing something with someone. Join me each month for Play of the Month to try with your child or the families whom you support in early intervention or other early childhood learning environment.

Cotton balls turn everyday moments into soft, simple invitations for connection, creativity, and shared discovery. This Play of the Month transforms a familiar household material into a world of scooping, building, pretending, and storytelling—meeting toddlers and preschoolers right where they are developmentally. With just a handful of fluffy cotton balls, play becomes a space for sensory exploration, early problem‑solving, flexible thinking, and those gentle moments of shared attention that strengthen relationships and communication. Whether families are stamping bright colors onto paper, building pathways and towers, or imagining cotton balls as snow, clouds, food, or tiny characters, the focus stays on connection, curiosity, and co‑creating joyful experiences together.

See below for activity ideas and learning goals linked to the ESDM Curriculum Checklist items to help you discover the play level that best suits your child or the children and families you support in early learning environments. 

Pay attention to what children like (or seem curious about) and follow their lead as long as you are a part of the action, too. Remember, the most important thing is for children to have fun doing this with you! Fun means engagement and that excites children's brains and bodies for meaningful learning to happen.

Simple Play (Sensorimotor & Exploratory)

These activities focus on cause-and-effect, sensory exploration, and basic motor skills—like banging, mouthing, or dropping—just to see what happens.

  • Scoop & Transfer: Move cotton balls between containers using spoons, tongs, or hands to explore movement and resistance.

  • Blow the Cotton Ball: Blow through a straw to move a cotton ball across a table and notice how breath changes its speed.

  • Squish & Pull: Pull cotton balls apart, roll them tighter, or dip them in water to explore texture changes.

  • Snow Bin: Explore a bin filled with cotton balls, cups, and scoops; search for hidden objects.

  • Soak & Paint: Soak cotton balls in water and let children paint them, noticing how water changes their weight and texture.

  • Stamping With Paint: Dip cotton balls in paint and stamp them onto paper to make simple marks and cheerful colors (petals, raindrops, sunshine).

    Tip for little hands: If touching wet or painted cotton balls feels too messy or uncomfortable, clip a clothespin onto the top to turn it into a simple handle. This keeps fingers clean, supports grasp development, and still lets children explore stamping, painting, dipping, and color play with ease.


Combination Play (Functional & Constructive)

These activities involve using materials together with intention—building, matching, or organizing.

  • Color Match: Dye cotton balls with food coloring and match them to colored cups or paper circles.

  • Fill the Shape: Place cotton balls inside drawn shapes (circle, heart, square) to complete the outline.

  • Sticky Wall Build: Stick cotton balls onto contact paper to create lines, clusters, or simple patterns.

  • Cotton Ball Towers: Use playdough and craft sticks to build small structures with cotton balls as connectors.

  • Pathways: Arrange cotton balls to create a road or trail for cars or animals to follow.

  • Rescue Mission: Hide small toys under cotton balls and use tools to uncover them.

  • Name Art: Arrange cotton balls to spell out a child’s name, then glue them down and paint them all the same or different colors.

  • Apple Tree Craft: Paint cotton balls red and glue them onto a tree template to create an apple tree.


Symbolic Play (Pretend & Representational)

These activities support imagination, role play, and storytelling.

  • Fluffy Animals: Glue cotton balls to a paper plate to make a sheep or bunny, then fold the plate so it stands up as a character.

  • Clouds & Rainbows: Glue cotton balls as clouds and add rainbow strips to create a weather scene that can become part of a story.

  • Snow Play: Use cotton balls as snow for animals, people, or vehicles and narrate what happens in the snowy world.

  • Campfire: Pretend cotton balls are marshmallows to roast on sticks; add hot chocolate or camping props.

  • Clouds & Weather Stories: Use cotton balls as clouds in a weather story (“The clouds are getting bigger… is it going to snow”).

  • Doctor Play: Use cotton balls as pretend bandages, medicine pads, or shots for stuffed animals.

  • Food Pretend: Use cotton balls as ice cream scoops, popcorn, or whipped cream in pretend cooking.

  • Animal Characters: Roll cotton balls into bunnies, sheep, or owls with simple props and bring them into a story.

  • Magic Potions: Use cotton balls in cups with colored water (or pretend colors) as ingredients for potions or soups.

  • Create a Scene: Use cotton balls as clouds, snow, sheep, or rocks in a small‑world scene and narrate what happens.

  • Character Helpers: Use cotton balls as treasures, magic snowballs, or healing stones that characters use in a story.

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